We always arrive 30 minutes earlier for Mikee’s Saturday “class”. This way, she has time to relax and (re)familiarize herself with the surroundings.
While we wait, I read some parenting magazines. One article catched my attention. I’m pretty sure I’ve read this before. So even before, I knew that parents are discouraged to say NO to their children but forgetful that I am, I forgot how to do this. So here I am blogging about it so in case I forget again, I know where to look.
Ok, I don’t remember all but I’ll share what I think are attainable for a mom like me who HAD the habit of saying NO to her daughter.
How to say NO to your kid/s without really saying it:
- Give the positive equivalent of what you want to say. Instead of saying, “No, you can’t eat candy till after dinner.”, say “Yes, you can have candy after dinner.”
- Give an option. When your kid plays ball inside the house where he/she is likely to break something, say “You can play ball outside or you can stay inside the house but keep the ball to your room.”
- Say how you or others feel. “If you hit her, she would be hurt and she’ll cry.” or “If you hit me, I’ll be hurt so please stop.”
- Don’t be too strict. You might be restricting your child, and saying NO too much. Kids have the right to play and be happy.
Honestly, after reading this and had the urge to say NO, I stopped to think what to tell Mikee. Yes, it isn’t instinct for me not to say NO yet. But at least now, I stop and think. I think I’m getting there.